*walks past the gym carrying extra large pizza*
my coworker is looking at reddit and I’m saying “cool meme” to every pic he’s opening regardless of what it is and he’s getting progressively more and more frustrated and yelling “IT’S NOT A MEME”
*rides off into the sunset on your dad*
im always like hell yeah i’d survive an apocalypse and then i remember sometimes I nearly faint in the shower because the water is too hot
””“”“why did you cut your hair?::”“”“” i cut my hair to piss you off. specifially you, i was thinking of you when i cut my hair. i was thinking that you, specifically, would be interested in what my newly short hair meant to you, specifically.
THEY’RE BEST FRIENDS… HOW DID I NOT KNOW ABOUT THIS BEFORE NOW…
french weed joke: 80
Nash Grier compilation of comebacks
"he probably shaves her arms while she sleeps"
yaaas drag him
dont flirt with me like this bc i will fall in love with u
When you ask your mom a simple question & she yells her response.